Michelangelo
by Storm Princess
Summary: After Don returns from the nightmarish reality in 'Same as it Never Was', he finds himself thinking about his youngest brother.


**Michelangelo**

Donnie worked somewhat tiredly in his lab, stopping only to glance at the clock next to him. 3:00 am. _What an ungodly hour to be awake. _Normally he would have been asleep like the rest of his brothers; but with all the nightmares he'd been having lately, sleep wasn't exactly an inviting prospect.

Ever since he had come back from the nightmarish alternate reality, his dreams were constantly haunted by thoughts of his younger brother. Sure, he had disturbing ones about Leo and Raph occasionally, but the majority of them focused on the orange wearing turtle.

_Last night I dreamed about you, I dreamed that you were older_

_You were looking like Picasso with a scar across your shoulder_

God, he wished it was just a dream. Mikey was so… hurt, in a word. Or maybe bitter could better describe it. He had never, but never, seen the youngest so angry. Or defeated. Especially not for prolonged periods of time. The Mikey he knew _never _gave up. The Mikey in this twisted world sounded… resigned. Resigned to the horrors of the Shredder controlled world.

And Mikey had _never_ gotten in his face before. Sure he could be insanely obnoxious when he wanted something, but he would never push himself on anyone past a certain point. Well, Raph was the exception. So when Mike had gotten in his personal space, Don was a little surprised to find himself backing up a bit. Sure, he knew his brother wouldn't do anything, but his sibling was acting so out of character that it was actually scaring him.

Instead of the prankster, the fun loving _innocent_ brother he knew, there was a battle hardened warrior in his place. And his voice; it was so… rough, like life had been chipping away at it for years.

When he took Don to Splinter's grave, his tone had softened for a second, but was soon back to the harsh one that Donnie just couldn't grow accustomed to. It was just so wrong to hear that voice on his brother's body.

_You were kneeling by the river_

_You were digging up the bodies buried long ago _

_Michelangelo _

And his arm… it had been so hard not to cry out when he saw the severed limb, to be the supportive older brother he wanted to be, or younger brother in this case.

And even though this Mikey wasn't technically _his _brother, he felt the overwhelming urge to be there for him, to rescue him from everything that had happened in this horrible parody of the turtle's life. But he knew that he couldn't, the youngest turtle had been through to much, seen too much. And he had been through most of it alone. Sure, Leo and Raph might have been there bodily for a while, but Donnie wasn't blind to the tension between the brothers, how Leo and Raph all but ignored their kid brother. (And proceeded to try and kill each other)

_Last night I dreamed about you, I dreamed you were a pilgrim_

_On a highway out alone to find the mother of your children_

_Who were still unborn and waiting in the wings of some desire abandoned long ago_

_Michelangelo_

There were, in times past, that he had wished Mike would grow up a little, quit goofing around 24/7, but since he had seen this other Mikey, that desire had long vanished. He saw what happened when Mikey lost his funny touch, his innocence. The team just fell apart. Sure, his disappearance had a good deal of weight in that, but the loss of Mikey's sunny attitude did just as much damage.

All because he vanished.

_Were you there that at Armageddon, was Paris really burning_

_Could I have been the one to pull you from the point of no returning_

_And did I hear you calling out my name, or was it forgotten long ago_

_Michelangelo_

It was almost unfathomable to Don how much damage the Shredder could do if he was gone. Maybe if he was there, he could have saved them, could have stopped the dissolving of the team. He was pretty sure Mikey resented him for not doing so; the younger one didn't even admit that he had missed him. The closest he had come was when he had admitted, albeit reluctantly, that the team really needed Don's level head. And Don wasn't stupid; he had noticed how his brother had minutely shrugged away from him when he put his hand on his shoulder.

And it hurt him that his Donatello's disappearance, intentional or otherwise, could cause his kid brother to fall apart like this.

_Last night I dreamed about you, I dreamed that you were riding_

_On a blood red painted pony up where the heavens were dividing _

_And the angels turned to ashes; you came tumbling with them to the earth so far below_

_Michelangelo _

But the worst thing by far was the youngest turtle's untimely death. He, of course, knew there was a good chance none of them would get out alive, but there was a huge difference between accepting it on an intellectual level and seeing your brothers slain in front of you, one by one.

_Last night I dreamed about you, I dreamed that you lay dying_

_In a field of thorns and roses with a hawk above you crying_

_All the warriors slain in battle, from an arrow given deep inside you long ago_

_Michelangelo_

He wished he would have kept a better watch on his brother, instead of just standing there. He had heard his brother calling for him, but he hadn't digested his brother's words until it was too late. He was sure he could never get over the sound of those swords tearing into the youngest one's flesh, hearing his brother being unable to hold back his pained dying screams.

Perhaps the most heartbreaking thing was his brother's last words. He had just seen that he was surrounded, there was no way he could jump out of the way or outfight them. And he had called for Donatello. Not Leonardo, not Raphael, but _him_. And his voice sounded so different, it sounded like it would have years ago. He sounded younger.

_Did you suffer at the end, would there be no one to remember_

_Did you banish all the old ghosts to the terms of your surrender_

_And could you hear me calling out your name_

_Well, I guess that I will never know_

_Michelangelo_

Or maybe it was the look on his younger sibling's face. As soon as Donny saw his face, he knew that Michelangelo was dead. Nothing could save him now. And he couldn't even be there with him, be there by his side. His little brother died alone.

And that was more then traumatizing for Don. It was more like his heart shattered, it hurt so bad to see his brother go that way.

Not that he was any less upset by Leo or Raph's deaths, but for some reason, with Leo and Raph you almost _expected_ something to happen to them sooner or later. He knew that Raph wanted to go down fighting, and that Leo would do anything to protect his family.

But Mikey… he had this disarming innocence about him, so much so that you could almost convince yourself that he was immortal if you tried hard enough. Seeing such an innocent spirit snuffed out right before your eyes was so… ah, he couldn't even begin to describe it.

_Last night I dreamed about you, I dreamed that you were weeping_

_And your tears bore down like diamonds for a love beyond all keeping_

_And you caught them one by one in the silk bandanna that I gave you long ago_

_Michelangelo_

He silently vowed to himself that he would never allow that to happen again. Now that he was back, he would watch his brother's back closer then ever, make sure he never changed. Not ever again.

He would not fail his brother a second time.


End file.
